"Written for Girls" Part 11 - Part 4: What should you do? 1. Move happily

Part 4 What should you do?

1 Move happily

What's wrong with moving around? Who wants to live in the same place all the time and get moldy!

HR directors often shake their heads and complain that many women tie their husbands to a fixed place and job because they are unwilling to leave familiar surroundings. Vern Elliott, general manager of Philadelphia's Atlantic Refining Company, calls such wives "crybabies" and believes they are a major obstacle to their husband's success.

Another general manager also told me that there was a promising young employee who had to sadly give up an upgrade opportunity that he had worked hard to obtain because his wife was unwilling to move out of town. His wife could not bear to leave her parents, her old friends, her classroom, and her beloved beautiful living room.

When a family is just beginning to adapt to a certain place, it does take a lot of courage for them to move to a strange place. It takes a good marriage foundation to adapt to this change. During World War II, there were many marriages that were united during the war and were unable to adapt to the fatigue of constantly moving from one military camp to another, and there was also a lack of effort to build a family in a turbulent environment and era.

But a resilient wife should be able to overcome these obstacles easily. Mrs. Lelund Kesner of Norfolk, Virginia, was one such wife. In the article Complicated Women's World, Mrs. Kershner wrote, "Two years ago, my husband was drafted to serve in the Navy. He left our newly decorated home and traveled across the country with my young son. This thought seemed like the worst possible thing. The next two years seemed like a huge, time-wasting void. When I moved to our first location, I was sure I was going to be miserable.

"But now that we've moved several times, I feel like my past thinking was so childish and spoiled. My husband is getting discharged soon and we're planning on settling down permanently, which we both hope to do. Although I'm not sure about the future. I'm so excited about these days, but I admit I'm a little sad to say goodbye to this lifestyle. The past two years have been a joy because I've learned to understand and live among many different types of people. . I have learned to tolerate and understand those who think and do things differently than I do. I have also learned to ignore the little annoyances of daily life when something I hope for doesn't work out. I love it more deeply. Understand that a lot of utensils and supplies cannot create a happy family. More importantly, you must be aware of love, understanding and warmth, and try your best under any circumstances.”

If you're faced with leaving a familiar environment and moving to a new area, I hope you'll keep these four tips in mind:

1. Don’t hope that the new environment will be the same as the old one

The environment and work content are different, just like people. Don't be discouraged if your husband's old position seems to have more status than his new one. There may be more opportunities for new jobs to be developed.

2. Don’t be discouraged just because you have lost the convenience that you have formed a habit of.

Do it as hard as you can and try your own mettle. Maybe you will get an unexpected surprise.

One summer, my husband taught a semester class at the University of Wyoming. Since we couldn't find a house at that time, we had to live in a simple house specially built for married veterans and their families. I admit that I was really not interested in our place at that time.

But the situation of living in that place gradually became one of the richest and most memorable experiences in my life. The house is easy to clean and our neighbors are nice. The young men and women went to school, raised their children, and happily made the most of their modest means. It made me feel very ashamed of my initial distaste.

We made many good friends that summer—and learned that success and happiness had little to do with a person's standard of living—as long as they lived a decent life.

3. Live and see the new environment you must move to before drawing conclusions about it.

A friend of mine moved to a small industrial town with her husband. It was the upgrade her husband had been waiting for. His wife only stayed in this small town for twenty-four hours before packing up and returning to their original home. Her husband's salary increase was just enough to hire a servant girl, and in the end her husband had to apply for a transfer back to his original job - all because his wife was unwilling to give her husband a good try in his new life after his transfer.

4. Make the most of new opportunities - don't let go of the past.

If you move to a new place, you will have to make a greater effort to make new friends, go to church on Mondays, clubs and various civic groups. Surround yourself with people who are worth interacting with in your new environment. Instead of complaining about things you don't like, work on improving them. If you can't change it, just laugh it off. There is no perfect place in this world.

Mrs. Robert Watson and her husband, a geophysics expert for Cartel Oil Company, have lived in every corner of the world. The Watsons and their four children have lived in the most desolate and remote areas in the world, but they have been able to live very comfortably and happily. It would be difficult to find a happier, more harmonious family.

Mrs. Watson believed that the home was a resting place for the heart and spirit. “As soon as the transfer order comes, I can pack up the whole family and get ready to go,” she said. “Everyone in our family has discovered that we can learn, enjoy, and grow anywhere in the world—if If you look for them with your heart.”

“For example, when we lived in the Bahamas, we knew that a famous diving champion was teaching diving there. This was a great opportunity for our mermaid, Suzy, to get lessons from an expert.

"As a result, she improved very quickly and won a prize in a diving competition. If we had lived somewhere else, maybe she wouldn't have gotten this great opportunity. I heard one of the general managers mention it once," Mrs. Watterson said. He continued, "His company must select several employees to serve abroad, but their wives must be able to adapt. As far as I know, the best way to adapt is to use the best resources in that unfamiliar area. Take advantage of opportunities to acquire new things instead of complaining all day about how great your home was in the past.

So, if your husband's job requires you to move around with him, then you should heed the following tips and happily move along with him.

1. Don’t expect the new environment to be the same as the old environment.

2. Don’t be troubled by losing the convenience you are accustomed to. These things are not so important.

3. Before you conclude that the new environment is not suitable for you, you should check it out first.

4. Make the most of new opportunities—don’t be reluctant to let go of the past.

All in all, what’s wrong with moving around? Who wants to live in the same place all the time and get moldy.

(To be continued)